By Jamie Harrison
At one point in time, you and your boyfriend were glued to the hip. However, slowly but surely the chaotic school year or your crazy work schedule has pulled you two in different directions and you find yourselves missing each others text messages or playing a serious game of phone tag. You’re willing to take a moment out of your day to spend time with him, but the love isn’t being reciprocated. First, determine what is taking up most of your man’s time. Is it school/work-related? Are you in a long distance relationship? Is it his friends? If he chooses to remain unavailable throughout most of the relationship, then you may need to reevalute the relationship and it may be time to run. Because the bottom line is: if he really cares for you then he do whatever it takes to keep the relationship strong.
- Explain to him how you feel him spending with you…or lack thereof. Sometimes guys can be a little, well, slow. He may not even know that there’s a problem in your relationship until you break it down to him. Address your feelings to him in a cool and calm manner. If you suspect that he may be spending his time with someone else, don’t accuse of him cheating right off of the bat. He may have just gotten comfortable in the relationship and doesn’t feel the need to spend every waking moment together.
- Find activities that you both can enjoy. You may want to spend every Saturday afternoon at the mall with him while that may not be the exact idea that boyfriend will want to spend his day off. If possible, pick one day out of the week where it only involves the two of you and nobody else (including your friends as well, missy!) Don’t be afraid to compromise with him and try doing some of the things he likes to do too. Try doing new things until you guys find something that you both enjoy doing. And keep trying new things to keep the excitement going! Lastly, don’t force or nag him into doing something that he clearly doesn’t want to do.
- Manage your schedules and have some alone time. As we all know, most men take a lot longer than women do when it comes to maturity. They’re like little boys at heart that want to spend most of their time hanging out with their friends. While it is healthy to have some distance from one another, it’s not a good thing if he wants to hang out with his boys all of time. It may be time to unleash your sexy side and show him things that his fellas can’t. Shoot him a sexy text or a sexy photo that will make him leave the basketball court before you can jump shot.
- Have your own fun. Have your own fulfilling life. Nothing is more satisfying than having your own fun and friends without having to depend on anybody to make you happy. Wanting to spend all your time with him will probably weird him out and push him away. Instead, have friends and activities of your own to make your boyfriend feel like he is a part of your life and not your reason for living.
Jamie Harrison is a University of Florida graduate and healthcare copywriter. Her portfolio can be found at http://www.wix.com/jamienharrison89/journoportfolio.